Ask (not) your date to be friend on facebook
Last Update : January 13, 2016
Everyone knows Facebook. (Almost) everyone has already killed time on Facebook, the most famous network where you can easily hit on a friend of a friend, actually the best combo for online dating! But…
Facebook is a messy place, a study shows that it creates lots of trouble in relationships and could even be linked to lots of divorces. If you’re planning to ask your date to join you on Facebook, better to be patient. If your date really insists: proceed with caution. Grinding too early on Facebook with someone you don’t really know can create problems where it normally would not have occurred.
The Facebook « friend request » will come at one point, now or later, so better be prepared to avoid a drama…
First of all, if you have been dating someone for a few days, or maybe haven’t you yet met in real life, but still chatting online, then becoming friends on Facebook might give you some information you would not have known right now… And it can give a wrong impression because you don’t know enough this person yet. Do you remember when you have created your Facebook account? Are you sure you want your potential-for-life partner to see your highschool crazy pictures?
Facebook creates jealousy while it’s (most of the time) absolutely not necessary. Imagine you girlfriend (who with things are just going perfect from now) searching for your friends on Facebook and discovering how sexy ladies you got on your page… How the hell could they know the interactions you have with that girl you were holding in your arms, drinking a beer in your other hand. If this girl is your sister-in-law, well, that’s it, but how could your date know it? Without the context, Facebook gives wrong information and lead us to be unnecessary jealous.
What we love in dating is to discover little by little our partner, to get to know who he (or she) is… This is a beautiful process, in real life as well as online, but this magic dating tradition doesn’t even exist on Facebook because it allows a fast-tracking flow which kills all romantic aspects of dating… You might discover things too soon and lose the natural way of getting to know your partner step by step.
Even if you don’t want to, it belongs to human nature to compare ourselves with the people your date have been in a relationship before… These are kind of private information you should not access to, unless your date told you about. We all have our secrets that should not be revealed, in order to protect the future of our love stories.
The past is the past, but Facebook keeps it sometimes on the topical scene… while you would prefer to keep it just for you.